The Marriage Bureau for Purebloods
by PrattlingPrincess
Summary: Bored with retirement, Mr. Dumbledore sets up a matchmaking service for purebloods. His assistant, Harry, shows promise, but Harry has no hope of marrying without a dowry. Right? AU. Will be HP/DM, which means SLASH! Also AD/MM, SB/RL, and many more.
1. Chapter 1

Pairings: Too many to list here, but the one's you'll see on a regular basis are: AD/MM, SB/RL, and HP/DM.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters, or anything that sounds remotely like JK Rowling might have thought it up first. I also do not own the novel The Marriage Bureau for Rich People, which is in fact owned by Farahad Zama and the Berkeley Publishing Group. So, since this is a story made up of JK Rowling's characters and Farahad Zama's plot, I can safely say that I own absolutely nothing.

A/N: So, I bought and read the novel The Marriage Bureau for Rich People, by Farahad Zama, and absolutely loved it. Then I got this crazy idea to adapt it to the Harry Potter world, which was a challenge, considering all the parings and side stories that I had to cram Rowling's characters into. But, I think it was worth it.

Just a few things I wanted to mention:

First off, I realize that several characters are going to be (extremely) OOC. I'm sorry about this, but I basically went down the list of characters in MBRP (Marriage Bureau for Rich People) and tried to cram Rowling's characters into the spots that best fit them. Some of the fits are far from perfect. Also, I ended up splitting the Weasleys up into separate families, which is a little weird. Just go with it.

Also, the original novel takes place in India, and religion and caste plays a large part in the story. I managed to use the blood politics in the wizarding world in place of a caste system, but the religious issue wasn't as tidy. I ended up just using a vague pagan religion-type-thing in place of Hinduism, Islam, and Christianity. The actual beliefs aren't important, just that the characters have them.

Some good news: since this is an adaptation and not an original story, there's no writer's block to worry about (yay!) and I will be updating this very regularly. The whole thing will come out to 20-ish chapters, so it should be a pretty good run. Enjoy, and PLEASE review!

* * *

Noise came early to Diagon Alley. The sun had hardly risen and Mr. Dumbledore could already hear the sounds of another day beginning on the busy street. He stood in the living room and listened to shopkeepers opening their stores, shouting greetings to each other.

He walked out to his small patio, the location of his proudest achievement: his garden. The space was small, tiny even, but in the small plot of dirt he had planted and tended to several beautiful plants. Mr. Dumbledore scanned the plants, which hadn't started blooming yet, seeing as how it was only early spring – Mr. Dumbledore stopped himself when he noticed two flowers on the vine that climbed up the wall that separated his small house from the alley.

He made his way closer to the flowers, admiring their bold red color, when he saw a hand reach over the top of the wall and start pulling on the highest bloom. "Excuse me!" he exclaimed, moving quickly over to the gate and sticking his head out into the street.

He saw a well-dressed young many pluck the flower from the vine. "Don't do that!" he demanded. The young man looked at him, unafraid.

"It's for the shrine, old man." He explained, and continued on his walk down the street. Mr. Dumbledore humphed, mourning the loss of the flower. It was one of the downsides to living so close to the shrine that stood at the end of Diagon Alley. A large statue of Merlin, the shrine was said to bring good luck to those that left a gift. Flowers being the most popular gift for shrines, it was hardly the first time Mr. Dumbledore's garden had been attacked by shrine-goers.

Mr. Dumbledore turned back towards the house when he heard chuckling. His wife, Minerva, stood in the doorway, an amused look on her face. "Such a look on your face, over a silly flower," she chided mockingly.

Mr. Dumbledore scowled, and was about to answer her when he saw a crow land on his wall from the corner of his eye. He turned to it just in time to see it pluck the remaining flower from the vine and fly off. Mr. Dumbledore swore, throwing his hands in the air in surrender, hearing Minerva laugh out loud.

"What exactly do you find so funny about losing both our flowers before the sun had even fully risen?" he demanded. Minerva simply shook her head, the laughter fading.

From the back of the house, they both heard the sounds of their maid, Molly, entering through the back door.

"Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Dumbledore," she greeted them cheerfully.

"Good morning Molly," Minerva replied, and followed Molly into the kitchen to discuss the day's housework.

Mr. Dumbledore remained standing on the patio, until he heard knocking on the gate. Opening it up, he saw a middle aged man standing in the street holding a large sign under his arm.

"Good morning, Sir." He said. "It's all ready" he added, gesturing with the sign.

"Good, good," Mr. Dumbledore said, stepping out into the alley with the man. "Shall I help you hang it up?"

"Thanks, Sir." The man replied. Together, they hung the sign on the wall next to Mr. Dumbledore's gate. When they'd finished, Mr. Dumbledore paid the man. He then walked across the street to get a good look at the whole effect.

He smiled, happy with the image. The sign read:

Mr. Dumbledore's Marriage Bureau for Purebloods

Prop: Mr. Albus Dumbledore, professor (retired)

Ph: 236672

The sign looked very sharp, hanging next to his gate. Mr. Dumbledore took the opportunity to view the alley. Though the street was busy, it wasn't the busiest part of the alley, with the larger more popular shops. Instead, most of the buildings in this area were slightly quieter shops and businesses, usually with apartments in the second and third floors.

Mr. Dumbledore's house stood out for its small size. Built before the alley was so developed, it was only one story, and was built on a small, narrow strip of land. The house consisted of a living room, two bedrooms, and a kitchen, with a bathroom to the side. The patio and garden in front were also unique, since all the other buildings extended all the way to the curb.

Minerva walked out to join her husband, having given Molly her instructions for the day.

"It looks rather good, doesn't it?" Mr. Dumbledore asked his wife.

"It does," she agreed.

After a few minutes of silence, Mr. Dumbledore turned to her. "Shall we set up the office?" he asked.

"Yes, lets."

They walked back across the street to their house, almost being run over by a man pushing a cart of firecrackers in the middle of the street.

They stepped through the gate and into the patio, and got to work.

First, they swept the patio and cleaned any cobwebs from the overhang that shielded the patio from the sun. Once that was done, they carried the desk out from the living room and onto the patio. They got Molly's help to carry the spare wardrobe out next, which would serve as a filing cabinet. Finally, they carried out the extra sofa and a chair for behind the desk.

They spent some time arranging things before they were satisfied. The desk stood at the end of the patio, facing the gate, so Mr. Dumbledore could see people enter. The patio was sitting with its back to the house, so clients were facing the desk, but still keeping an open area in the middle of the patio.

The wardrobe stood with its back to the house as well, but it was behind the desk instead of in front of it. Next to the wardrobe was the fireplace, which was connected to the floo network.

After the furniture was arranged, Minerva went back inside, leaving Mr. Dumbledore to arrange the office supplies in the wardrobe and on the desk.

When Mr. Dumbledore was done, he sat in the desk quietly and looked at his new "office." Though it was outside, the overhang protected him from the sun and rain, and warming charms kept it mild even in the winter.

The marriage bureau had been his brother's idea, actually. After a year and a half of retirement, Mr. Dumbledore thought he was going to lose his mind with boredom. Finally, fed up with the man's restlessness, Aberforth suggested that he start up a business, as a pastime.

Mr. Dumbledore's gaze swept over the patio, eventually resting on the two pictures hanging from the wall. One was of a young couple with a small boy sitting in between them. The small family was smiling, and the child waving cheerfully at the camera. The second picture was of a young man with dark hair and a hooked nose, who started strait at him challengingly.

Mr. Dumbledore briefly considered taking the pictures down, for professionalism's sake, but then decided against it.

Minerva came back out an hour later.

"Any calls?" she asked.

"No, not yet," Mr. Dumbledore replied. "But it's still early."

"True," she said. "Did the ad go out today?"

Mr. Dumbledore nodded, handing her the day's paper.

She opened it to the classifieds section, and found Mr. Dumbledore's ad circled in green ink.

It read:

For widest choice among Pureblood brides/grooms, contact Mr. Dumbledore's Marriage Bureau for Purebloods.

Minerva smiled in appreciation, and then turned to inspect the patio as Mr. Dumbledore had just done. Her gaze also landed on the two photos. "We should call Severus," she suggested.

"No!" Mr. Dumbledore exclaimed. "We will only argue, and I don't want any arguments today." He argued.

Minerva sighed, and went back inside.

A few minutes later, the bell hanging from the fireplace rung, signaling an incoming floo call. Excitedly, Mr. Dumbledore knelt down next to the hearth.

He was admittedly disappointed when his brother, Aberforth's face appeared in the fire.

"Any clients yet?" he asked.

"Not yet," Mr. Dumbledore muttered.

"Well, since things are still slow, do you want to accompany me to the temple today?" Aberforth continued.

"But it's not Friday," Mr. Dumbledore pointed out.

"And where does it say that we can only visit the temple on Fridays?" Aberforth demanded. Whereas Mr. Dumbledore had grown restless and bored with retirement, Aberforth had reacted by throwing himself into religion, becoming increasingly pious with age.

Mr. Dumbledore declined the invitation, and returned to the desk.

Though it was slow to start at first, Mr. Dumbledore did eventually get calls from prospective clients. The trick to a marriage bureau is that it is slow to start. With no other members to match clients to, the first few memberships are the hardest to get.

Over the next few weeks, however, Mr. Dumbledore's business grew as he collected more and more clients.

Mr. Dumbledore's Marriage Bureau for Rich People had officially opened.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I still own nothing.

A/N: So, I know the first chapter was a little dry, but the marriage bureau had to be established. You won't meet Harry in this chapter either, but I promise you'll see him in chapter three. Enjoy!

Oh, and a word about the whole pureblood thing. Since Mr. Dumbledore's marriage bureau is for purebloods, it would make sense if all the clients were purebloods. Some of them aren't, according to JK Rowling. However, just use your imagination. It is AU, after all.

* * *

A month had gone by, and in that time, Mr. Dumbledore's business had boomed. It had started slowly, but Mr. Dumbledore really attributed most of the business growth to Mandy Brocklehurst. Her father had become a member, looking for a husband for his very wealthy daughter. Mr. Dumbledore still remembered the meeting.

_"And what exactly can we expect for 300 galleons?" Mr. Brocklehurst asked, sitting on the sofa._

_"Well, Sir, to start with we will give you a list of men who fit the qualifications you mentioned in your paperwork. We'll continue to send you updated lists until you find a match. Also, we will advertise on your behalf, which is what most of your fee will go towards."_

_After Mr. Brocklehurst had paid and left, Mr. Dumbledore got to writing the ad. Mr. Brocklehurst had only one major qualification, which was that any possible matches have a job in the Ministry._

_After playing with the wording for a while, Mr. Dumbledore read the finished product, pleased. "Wealthy heiress seeking pureblood groom with Ministry position. If interested, contact Mr. Dumbledore's Marriage Bureau for Purebloods."_

_Unsurprisingly, Mr. Dumbledore received dozens of responses. He forwarded them to Mr. Brocklehurst, while also convincing many of the prospective grooms to join the bureau themselves, in case they weren't picked._

_The next week, Mr. Dumbledore's ad read "For a wide range of grooms with Ministry positions, please contact Mr. Dumbledore's Marriage Bureau for Purebloods."_

* * *

Minerva stood at the gate, watching people walking by in the alley. On the patio behind her, Mr. Dumbledore was talking to a client on the phone. She listened to the one-sided conversation, until she saw a familiar face walking by.

"Mrs. Sprout!" she greeted, waving her hand at the short woman walking by.

"Oh, Minerva!" Mrs. Sprout greeted her. "How are you?"

"Good, good." Minerva answered. Mrs. Sprout had lived in the area just as long as the Minerva and Mr. Dumbledore. She was particularly good at keeping track of the families that had moved away over the years, and she routinely updated Minerva on the gossip.

"Did you hear about Poppy?" Mrs. Sprout asked.

"Poppy Pomfrey?" Minerva asked.

"The same. You remember that her son got married last year?"

"Yes, I remember." Minerva answered. She and Mr. Dumbledore had even gone to the wedding.

"Well, Poppy's daughter-in-law turned out to be rather high maintenance. She and Poppy would get into little spats all the time. The girl would tell Poppy's son that his mother was making her miserable."

"Oh, how unfortunate." Minerva said.

"Well, things kept on like this for months, and do you know what that girl finally did?" Mrs. Sprout asked.

"What?"

"She demanded to her husband that he make Poppy leave." Mrs. Sprout said.

"She wants to kick Poppy out of the house?" Minerva asked, shocked.

"Yes, and that ungrateful son of hers did it!"

"No!" Minerva gasped. "Where is Poppy staying now?"

"She's staying with her sister, but it's the most horrible thing. Can you imagine? After all she did to raise that boy, and he kicks her out of their house on the whims of his spoiled wife." Mrs. Sprout tutted.

Minerva and Mrs. Sprout chatted for a while longer, and then Mrs. Sprout went on her way.

Minerva walked back through the patio and into the house. In the kitchen, she found Molly starting on the dishes.

"Good morning, Molly." Minerva greeted the maid.

"Oh, good morning Mrs. Dumbledore." Molly responded. Minerva heard the sound of little giggles coming from behind Molly's skirt.

"And who do we have here?" Minerva asked, smiling.

Two identical red heads peeked from behind Molly, grinning and giggling.

"Ah, do we have guests?" Mr. Dumbledore asked, walking in from the patio.

Two giggles was his answer.

"All right, let's see. It's Fred and George," Mr. Dumbledore guessed, pointing at the right twin first, and then the left.

Giggling, the two boys shook their heads. "No, I'm Fred, and he's George," the twin on the left said.

"It's okay, though-" George started.

"-because even our daddy-"

"-can't tell us apart."

Mr. Dumbledore chuckled and took the boys out onto the patio to watch the birds landing on the wall.

* * *

That afternoon, after Molly and the twins had left, Mr. Dumbledore was sitting on the patio when Mr. Brocklehurst walked through the gate.

"Why, good afternoon Mr. Brocklehurst," Mr. Dumbledore greeted the man, shaking his hand.

"Mr. Dumbledore, I've just come by to thank you." Mr. Brocklehurst said.

"Thank me for what?" Mr. Dumbledore asked.

"My daughter Mandy is engaged, and it's all thanks to you, Sir." Mr. Brocklehurst said.

"That's fantastic!" Mr. Dumbledore exclaimed.

Mr. Brocklehurst insisted that Mr. Dumbledore accept a 300 galleon bonus before he left, leaving Mr. Dumbledore feeling proud and motivated to find matches for more of his clients.

* * *

Another month later, and the marriage bureau had grown even more. Mr. Dumbledore was enjoying the work immensely, but Minerva was unhappy. The business took up so much of Mr. Dumbledore's time; he couldn't even take lunch with her anymore.

Aberforth had admitted that Mr. Dumbledore had stopped going out with him and his old friends on the weekends for tea and walks like he usually did. Mr. Dumbledore was clearly exhausted, but he wouldn't slow down.

When Minerva had talked to Mr. Dumbledore about it, he was adamant. "This is a marriage bureau," he explained. "If I slow down, I'm hurting my clients by not doing my best to find them a match."

It was a Sunday, Mr. Dumbledore's busiest day. He was out on the patio, talking to a client, while Minerva sat in the kitchen with Aberforth.

"He doesn't have time for anything anymore, Aberforth" Minerva complained. "And he won't listen to me on the matter."

"Don, worry, Minerva," Aberforth said, patting her hand calmingly. "There's a simple way to solve this. What my brother needs is an assistant, someone to help him with the bureau. That way, he won't have to do all the work himself."

"Aberforth, that's brilliant!" Minerva exclaimed, clapping her hands together.

"What's brilliant?" Mr. Dumbledore asked, sitting down at the table with a sigh.

"You're going to get an assistant," Minerva announced.


End file.
